Saturday, July 17, 2010

Crude Sexual Euphemism [chat]

LiLo's friends are worried that she won't be able to survive smoke-free jail.

Well, I have something she can smoke.

28 comments:

  1. My weiner.

    My weiner is something she can smoke.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I had to follow the link to find out who LiLo was.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I too had to follow the link to find out who she was.

    And i must say I hate her, and her friends even more.

    Poor LiLo needs a smoke, "its a serious condition."
    Symptoms include: irritability, fatigue, headache, insomnia, constipation, sweating, coughing, poor concentration, depression, increased appetite, and cravings for tobacco.

    Depression is the only one that is a serious condition, and i am sure she will be for her night in jail.

    ReplyDelete
  4. sometimes, people take getting things done to far.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Caleb and I had that idea for J once. We thought it might motivate him to do stuff that wasn't sleep and eat soup.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I do not care what you haters think. There was a time when LiLo was not a cocaine addicted, strung out, whorish, alcohol monitoring ankle bracelet wearing, trainwreck of a slut.

    She had a good head on her shoulders for about a week after she turned 21.

    ReplyDelete
  7. You're all missing the point. Poor Miz Lohan has seen Venture Brothers. She knows what it's like in there. She knows she's got needs. And By God, she wants to be ready when Dean Venture accidently ends up in the Scared Straight program.

    She's going to drop a whole carton just to ensure she snaps him up. Girl's gotta have a lapdog and manservant, no?

    ReplyDelete
  8. ... Mikey, how does one find a "Maiden of Juggled Priorities".. and what does one offer such a lady to catch her eye?

    ReplyDelete
  9. http://consumerist.com/2010/07/magic-pleasure-bed-only-300.html

    That's brilliant.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Wow, I can tell already, I'm going to lose my entire night watching these videos. They are full of awesome.

    ReplyDelete
  11. That guy has an awesome job.

    1) Stand in towel.
    2) Be fantastic.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Wait.. really?

    You don't like that?

    I mean.. have you SEEN the comics' depiction of Odin?

    That's pretty damn good. Add in post-production work, and it'll be fine.

    I really think critics are looking at Thor pics like fanboys were looking at Wind Waker screens.

    ReplyDelete
  13. no - i don't like it - it looks like shit. some.

    some notes on my option of Thor.

    1) I fucking hate Thor. I cannot understand how or why thor remains a part of marvel. make it makes sense in a sort of historical-superhero-comics-bullshit sense that drives me bat shit crazy.

    2) Thor only works for me in a world it is unclear whether he has really a god or is just so mentally ill that his super powers make him think he is a god.

    Thor can only work when he is so delusional that even the people around him do not know if he is a god or just a nut job.

    ie Ultimate Thor (at least in the 1st 3ish trades

    ReplyDelete
  14. You and me, man. We about to tussle.

    Thor only works in confused audience--gaming Is He or Isn't He? That's like saying Hercules only works that way.

    'cept Marvel's made Hercules into the ultimate buddy comedy.

    As for thinking Thor is a historical thing, totally missing the point of a good Thor story. It's about balls out crazy Kirby cosmic stuff. Epic, and Godly, maybe, but less so in a theology sense, and more in a Classical sense.
    Have you read the Simonson run? If not, .. seriously... consider it. I suspect you'll find much more there to be enthused about.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I can't believe I'm coming back to this so soon, but.. seriously... it's in my head, and I'm frothing at the mouth.

    The thing about Thor is he's robust enough to carry multiple interpretations... from Serious, Weighty matters of an Epic Hero, drawn from poems.. to the wildly comedic, like in Incredible Hercules and Super Hero Squad..

    And not just Thor. His entire supporting cast works the same way, whether it's Beta Ray Bill, as tragic martyr figure, or as Space Horse Jesus, or the Warriors Three, one day comedic foils, the next serious and respected members of the Asgard elite. Loki as cackling buffoon gives way to Loki as spiteful, furious, and bitter-heartedly envious of Thor for things beyond his control.

    Reading your issue w/ Thor is like saying Batman doesn't make sense unless you assume he's a broken individual, his development permenantly arrested in some way, that night in Crime Alley. Because who could believe a mature adult would dress up in fetish gear w/ a young ward, ang go out in public, doing good deeds, and cautioning the youth to "Think clean thoughts, chum."...

    I mean.. If I'm forced to choose Miller's Batman, Morrison's Batman, O'Neil's Batman, JLU's Batman, and Brave and the Bold's Batman, I'll forfeit the game. There's more to be done with the character than any single one tact. Just as there's more to be done w/ Thor than any one version. (It's why we've got three currently, counting Puddlegulp)

    ReplyDelete
  16. Hey, person who knows Japanese: What is the japanese word for "anyone"? As in, were I running down the street in Japan attempting to discern if anyone were there I would yell "_____".

    A character is yelling that in this episode of Naruto.

    And it sounds like he's yelling "Naruto?!?!" but he's yelling "Anyone?!" in the moon-speak.

    ReplyDelete
  17. AWESOME!


    IS THERE NO ONE ELSE?!

    I think I know what the next [chat] is going to be.

    ReplyDelete
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    Is this possible?

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