Monday, December 10, 2007

Tom Nook is a Thieving Bastard: The Game

Last semester I picked up BASIC programming again and spent a couple of months learning how to do some of the things I was too stupid to do when I was a kid: things like drawing bitmaps, making rudimentary text parsers, and capturing keypresses in useful ways.

Jay and I started to do a game, which of course means that we had a lot of fun brainstorming, and then the concept died, whithered on the vine. But no matter, because here is a simple game I put together this March which allows the player to shoot Tom Nook in the head and take his damn bells (well, you can move a crosshairs over Nook's head and press SPACEBAR, and a bag of bells will appear as Nook disappears).




Special thanks for Animal Crossing for featuring the most child-slave-drivingest raccoon in the universe.

Source code on the comments page (if it'll work).
at

66 comments:

  1. MA17December 10, 2007 at 5:41 PM

    DECLARE SUB INSTRCT ()
    DECLARE SUB LVLOVER (SCORE!)
    SCREEN 13
    DIM BELLX(50), BELLY(50), BELLHIT(50), BSHOT(50), BMULT(50)
    PI = 3.14159
    RETX = 160
    RETY = 100
    TNY = 21
    TNDELR = 100
    ENDTIME = 120

    RESTORE NCOLORS 'SET NOOK PALETTE
    FOR PAL = 1 TO 6
    READ PALCOL
    PALETTE PAL, PALCOL
    NEXT PAL

    RESTORE BCOLORS 'SET BELL PALETTE
    FOR PAL = 7 TO 13
    READ PALCOL
    PALETTE PAL, PALCOL
    NEXT PAL

    INSTRCT
    LVLTIME = TIMER + ENDTIME
    CLS

    DO WHILE INKEY$ <> "q" 'START THE GAME
    RANDOMIZE TIMER
    TNDEL = INT(TNDELR / 10)
    LOCATE 2, 1: PRINT TNDEL
    DELAY = TIMER + .01 'WAIT .01 SECONDS
    DO WHILE DELAY > TIMER
    LOOP

    A = 1: B = 18: C = 1

    SCORE$ = STR$(SCORE)
    BLEN = LEN(SCORE$)
    LOCATE 2, 20 - BLEN: PRINT SCORE$; " BELLS"

    LOCATE 2, 35: PRINT INT(LVLTIME - TIMER)
    IF LVLTIME < TIMER THEN LVLOVER (SCORE)

    FOR K = 1 TO 3
    IF RETX / 10 - 1 = TNX AND RETY / 10 = TNY + 4 - K THEN TARGET = 1: BMULT(BC) = 2 ^ K
    IF RETX / 10 - 1 <> TNX AND RETY / 10 <> TNY + 4 - K THEN TARGET = 0
    NEXT K

    FOR Z = 1 TO BC
    IF RETX / 10 - 1 = BELLX(Z) AND RETY / 10 - 1 = BELLY(Z) THEN BELLHIT(Z) = 1: ELSE BELLHIT(Z) = 0
    NEXT Z
    IF TNTIMER = 0 THEN
    LINE (TNX * 10, TNY * 10)-(TNX * 10 + 18, TNY * 10 + 32), 0, BF
    TNY = TNY + 1: TNTIMER = TNDEL
    IF TNY > 20 THEN TNX = INT(RND * 29): TNY = -1
    IF SHOT = 1 THEN
    LINE (TNX * 10, TNY * 10)-(TNX * 10 + 18, TNY * 10 + 32), 0, BF
    SHOT = 0
    TNY = 21
    END IF
    END IF

    IF TNTIMER > TNDEL / 2 THEN A = 18: B = 1: C = -1 'TURN HIS BODY

    RESTORE NOOK 'DRAW NOOK
    FOR Y = 1 TO 17
    FOR X = 1 TO 18
    READ PCOLOR
    PSET (TNX * 10 + X, TNY * 10 + Y), PCOLOR
    NEXT X
    NEXT Y
    FOR Y = 18 TO 32
    FOR X = A TO B STEP C
    READ PCOLOR
    PSET (TNX * 10 + X, TNY * 10 + Y), PCOLOR
    NEXT X
    NEXT Y

    FOR Z = 1 TO BC 'DRAW BELLS
    RESTORE BELLS
    FOR Y = 1 TO 15
    FOR X = 3 TO 16
    READ PCOLOR
    PSET (BELLX(Z) * 10 + X, BELLY(Z) * 10 + Y), PCOLOR
    NEXT X
    NEXT Y
    NEXT Z

    LINE (RETX, RETY - 15)-(RETX, RETY - 5), 0 'ERASE CROSSHAIRS
    LINE (RETX - 20, RETY)-(RETX - 5, RETY), 0
    LINE (RETX, RETY + 15)-(RETX, RETY + 5), 0
    LINE (RETX + 20, RETY)-(RETX + 5, RETY), 0
    CIRCLE (RETX, RETY), 15, 0

    SELECT CASE INKEY$ 'GET KEYBOARD INPUT
    CASE "d"
    RETX = RETX + 10
    CASE "a"
    RETX = RETX - 10
    CASE "s"
    RETY = RETY + 10
    CASE "w"
    RETY = RETY - 10
    CASE " "
    FOR Z = 1 TO BC
    IF BSHOT(Z) = 1 THEN BELLHIT(Z) = 0
    IF BELLHIT(Z) = 1 THEN
    SCORE = SCORE + (100 * BMULT(Z))
    LINE (BELLX(Z) * 10, BELLY(Z) * 10)-(BELLX(Z) * 10 + 16, BELLY(Z) * 10 + 15), 0, BF
    BSHOT(Z) = 1: BELLY(Z) = -100: BELLY(Z) = -100
    END IF
    NEXT Z
    IF SHOT = 1 THEN TARGET = 0
    IF TARGET = 1 THEN BC = BC + 1: BELLX(BC) = TNX + 2: BELLY(BC) = TNY + 2: TNTIMER = 10: TNDELR = TNDELR - 2: SHOT = 1
    CASE "q"
    END
    END SELECT
    LINE (RETX, RETY - 15)-(RETX, RETY - 5) 'DRAW CROSSHAIRS
    LINE (RETX - 20, RETY)-(RETX - 5, RETY)
    LINE (RETX, RETY + 15)-(RETX, RETY + 5)
    LINE (RETX + 20, RETY)-(RETX + 5, RETY)
    CIRCLE (RETX, RETY), 15
    TNTIMER = TNTIMER - 1 'DECREMENT TNTIMER
    LOOP

    NCOLORS:
    DATA 263952,396568,596008,2104096,1904142,2043703
    BCOLORS:
    DATA 1181202,1840414,3023653,401705,1125425,1848124,3160639
    NOOK:
    DATA 0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0
    DATA 0,0,1,2,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0
    DATA 0,0,2,4,4,3,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,2,2,3,2,2
    DATA 0,0,2,3,3,2,2,1,1,1,2,2,3,3,3,4,4,2
    DATA 0,0,0,2,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,2,2,3,2,2
    DATA 0,0,1,3,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,2,2,1,1,2,1,0
    DATA 0,0,3,3,3,1,1,1,1,1,2,3,3,2,1,1,2,0
    DATA 0,1,5,4,6,1,1,1,1,1,2,3,3,3,1,1,1,0
    DATA 0,1,4,4,6,1,1,1,1,1,6,4,5,3,1,1,1,2
    DATA 0,1,6,6,2,3,3,2,1,1,6,4,4,4,1,1,1,1
    DATA 0,1,1,1,2,3,3,3,2,1,2,6,6,2,1,1,1,2
    DATA 1,1,2,2,1,1,1,2,3,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,2,2
    DATA 1,3,3,1,1,1,1,1,2,2,2,1,1,1,1,1,2,2
    DATA 0,3,3,3,1,1,1,1,1,2,2,2,1,1,2,2,2,2
    DATA 0,0,2,3,2,1,1,1,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,0
    DATA 0,0,0,1,2,2,1,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,0,0
    DATA 0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,0,0,0,0

    DATA 0,1,1,1,0,0,2,3,3,3,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0
    DATA 1,1,1,1,1,2,3,3,3,3,6,3,3,2,2,2,1,0
    DATA 1,1,2,1,3,3,3,3,6,6,6,6,3,2,2,1,1,0
    DATA 0,1,2,3,3,2,3,3,6,6,6,6,6,1,0,0,0,0
    DATA 0,0,2,3,2,3,3,6,6,6,6,6,6,2,1,0,0,0
    DATA 0,0,1,2,2,2,3,3,6,6,6,6,6,2,2,0,0,0
    DATA 0,0,1,1,5,5,3,3,6,6,6,6,4,4,4,0,0,0
    DATA 0,0,0,0,5,5,5,5,4,4,4,4,5,5,1,0,0,0
    DATA 0,0,0,0,5,5,5,5,5,5,5,4,5,1,5,0,0,0
    DATA 0,0,0,0,5,5,5,5,5,4,4,4,4,5,1,0,0,0
    DATA 0,0,0,0,5,5,5,5,5,4,5,4,5,1,5,0,0,0
    DATA 0,0,0,0,5,5,5,5,5,4,4,5,4,4,1,0,0,0
    DATA 0,0,0,0,5,5,5,5,5,4,5,4,4,5,5,0,0,0
    DATA 0,0,0,0,0,5,5,5,4,5,5,5,5,5,5,0,0,0
    DATA 0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,5,5,5,5,5,0,0,0,0,0
    BELLS:
    DATA 00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,07,07,07,00,00,00
    DATA 00,00,00,00,00,00,00,07,13,13,12,07,00,00
    DATA 00,00,00,00,00,00,07,13,13,12,12,11,07,00
    DATA 00,00,00,00,00,08,07,07,07,09,11,10,08,00
    DATA 00,00,00,00,08,11,11,08,07,08,08,09,00,00
    DATA 00,00,00,08,13,12,12,12,11,08,00,00,00,00
    DATA 00,00,08,13,12,12,12,12,12,11,08,00,00,00
    DATA 00,08,12,13,12,12,12,12,10,12,11,08,00,00
    DATA 08,10,13,13,13,12,12,11,08,11,12,12,08,00
    DATA 08,11,13,13,13,10,10,08,08,08,08,10,08,00
    DATA 08,11,13,13,12,12,12,10,08,08,12,12,10,08
    DATA 08,11,12,13,12,12,12,10,12,08,12,11,11,08
    DATA 08,10,11,12,12,12,10,12,12,11,10,11,10,08
    DATA 00,08,10,11,11,11,11,11,11,11,10,10,08,00
    DATA 00,00,08,08,08,08,08,08,08,08,08,08,00,00

    SUB INSTRCT
    LOCATE 5, 7: PRINT "TOM NOOK IS A THIEVING BASTARD"
    LOCATE 8, 3: PRINT "Use your slingshot to make Tom drop"
    LOCATE 9, 3: PRINT "his precious goddamn bells before"
    LOCATE 10, 3: PRINT "time runs out!"
    LOCATE 12, 3: PRINT "Use WASD to move the crosshairs"
    LOCATE 13, 3: PRINT "and press SPACEBAR to fire"
    LOCATE 15, 3: PRINT "Collect bells by shooting the bags"
    LOCATE 17, 3: PRINT "Shoot Nook in the head for more bells"
    LOCATE 23, 10: PRINT "PRESS ANY KEY TO BEGIN"
    SLEEP 0
    END SUB

    SUB LVLOVER (SCORE)
    CLS
    SLEN = LEN(STR$(SCORE))
    DO WHILE INKEY$ <> "q"
    LOCATE 10, 8: PRINT "LEVEL OVER, PRESS Q TO END";
    LOCATE 13, 14 - SLEN / 2: PRINT "YOU GOT"; SCORE; "BELLS"
    LOCATE 16, 8: PRINT "You fixed his shit but good"
    LOOP
    END
    END SUB

    ReplyDelete
  2. MA17December 10, 2007 at 5:43 PM

    If you copy this and paste it into a txt file, change the extension of that file to .BAS, then download qBASIC (check the internets), you should be able to load it up, assuming your PC is able to run DOS programs. If not, then try DOSBox, or just admit to yourself that pressing a button to pretend to harm Tom Nook is really not worth much effort.

    ReplyDelete
  3. MA17December 10, 2007 at 5:46 PM

    One known bug is that if you shoot the area just above Nook's head as he moves out of the target, a bag will drop, but it won't have any bells.

    Actually, that's not a bug, that's a life lesson. Don't miss Nook.

    ReplyDelete
  4. KylebrownDecember 10, 2007 at 6:51 PM

    Tom Nook IS a thieving bastard.


    Side Note: You should have some leading comments on your awesomely, awesome game stating that all rights are reserved, and that said game is your property, since you decided to post the source. This game could totally take off, and you would be left watching some Tom Nook like thieving bastard making a fortune off of your hard work.

    ReplyDelete
  5. _J_December 10, 2007 at 8:38 PM

    Isn't that what happened with Tetris?

    Also, we need to have a day on which we all get together and figure out how to make money off of our comebined skills.

    If the fucking Wayans brothers can do it then surely we can as well.

    ReplyDelete
  6. _J_December 10, 2007 at 8:55 PM

    I ran it. I vented frustration. Nook died.

    What a great game.

    ReplyDelete
  7. _J_December 10, 2007 at 8:56 PM

    Linky Link for Qbasic

    ReplyDelete
  8. RoscoeDecember 11, 2007 at 12:04 AM

    gods damn him.

    I thought Nook was out of my life forever.

    I moved on. And then you came waltzing in.

    With your suitcase, slingshot, and 100 untraceable acorns.

    Right when the Credit Card bills come due, and the Bells are in the red.

    I thought I was out.

    I shouldn't have thought at all....

    ReplyDelete
  9. _J_December 11, 2007 at 9:36 AM

    It's my birthday so I have to play Animal Crossing to get my cake.

    My sweet, sweet cake.

    ReplyDelete
  10. MA17December 11, 2007 at 2:00 PM

    I bet Nook ate your cake.

    And I can't blame him. Ghee lies in ruins, weeds choking the life out of plant and animal alike, fish and bugs lying dead in their respective wings of the museum, at last feeling camaraderie with the dinosaurs that once roamed the land.

    In a place like Ghee, when a cake appears, you don't wait around for your first citizen to come claim it, you eat the damn cake.

    ReplyDelete
  11. MA17December 11, 2007 at 2:01 PM

    And then you slide Resetti a few grand to look the other way while you reset the game and enjoy the cake again.

    ReplyDelete
  12. _J_December 11, 2007 at 4:04 PM

    Resetti stopped accepting my bribes. I think he may exist in a hole under my house doing hookers and blow.

    Except when I try to reset the game without saving and then he pops up like a strung-out addict.

    ReplyDelete
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