Guster: Long Night

Guster has released a new music video.



I think it has to do with some of the usual Guster things, and maybe someone else's mythology.

Stupid Cat

Meet the Bronies

Star Wars Call Me Maybe

This is what the internet is for.

Glee: I Will Always Love You

Songs for Paper Writing: Miko Miko Nurse

It kills sadness.

Songs for Paper Writing: Super Bass

Walking on (x2) Kickin' Ass

Some assnoob bet me tonight's dinner tab that the lyrics are:
Walking on
Walking on
Walking on
Broken Glass.

Needless to say, I really wish he'd gone double-or-nothing on the lyrics to:


Also, is that Dr. Phil on keyboards?

31 Days of Weird Al

On facebook and Niffty Stuff I am working on a series of posts about Weird Al Yankovic, Each day this month I am writing short post about a video.

Yeserday was Day 3: Eat It

Jonathon Coulton - Glasses

Pretty Great.

Billy Corgan: w/out hair vs. with hair

I propose the thesis that Billy Corgan is better with hair.

1993


Fuck if I know the date


1996; eat a dick you fucking purist


Later, presumably; god, fuck you


Yeah. Totes better w/ hair.

"w/" means "with".

Behold The Earworm

Reggie Watts is awesome

Something you guys might enjoy:




This guy was on Conan last night and it reminded me that I wanted to post this a while back.

Ke$ha - Blah Blah WHAT IN GOD'S NAME IS THIS SHIT?!

What the name of unholy fuck is this shit? There is no possible way that anyone could construe this as music. It is simply nonsense with beeps. One cannot appreciate the lyrics, the melody, or even dance to it. It's just fucking noise. And then she starts bowling? What the fuck bowling alley would allow Ke$ha admittance? Bowling alleys have standards. Low standards, to be sure, but standards none the less.

And what the fuck is that guy doing at the start of the video? Is that...tone setting? Are they trying to establish an atmosphere in a Ke$ha video; is this a fucking narrative? Ok, some guys are douche bags...and now Ke$ha is singing about how some guys are douche bags. Great. Does this merit a song? What the fuck is going on?

AND WHY DOES IT KEEP BEEPING AT ME?! WHY CAN SHE FLY?!

Nothing in this entire situation makes any god damned sense. The video, the lyrics, the "music", the ANYTHING. This is nonsense with beeps. Irritating, irritating beeps.

But, perhaps, I judge too harshly. Perhaps there is some merit to this song to be found in the lyrics. Well, let's see...

Boy come on get your rocks off
Come put a little love in my glove box
I wanna dance with no pants on
Meet me in the back with the jack and the jukebox

Ok, first of all, "glove box" has never and shall never be a euphemism for "vagina". No. We're not going there. Furthermore, a "little" love? Is she insulting the male to whom she is addressing this? Is his "love", in fact, "little"? Why, in that case, would she want it? Does she need a "little" love ("love" means "penis") because her "glove box" is little? That seems like a medical problem moreso than an endearing character trait.

I dont really care where you live at
Just turn around boy and let me hit that
Don't be a little bitch with your chit chat
Just show me where your dick's at

Unless an individual has a bizarre anatomy, the location of one's dick is relatively consistent for all males insofar as dicks do not randomly grow from any location. Persons will not have dicks growing out of their knees, feet, or chest. Dicks grow from that spot between the legs where the legs meet the torso. That is where dicks occur. But, perhaps, Ke$ha's problem is not that she thinks dicks grow in random locations but, rather, she has never encountered a dick, has never experienced a dick, and so does not know where they are.

I jest. Of course Ke$ha knows where dicks are. Because, I mean, come on.

Additionally, why would the guy need to "turn around"? If the guy is talking to Ke$ha, presumably he is facing her. And given how dicks work...there would be no need for the guy to turn around in order to afford Ke$ha access to his dick. The only reason for a guy to turn around would be...

oh...

OH!!!!

So, basically, this song is about Ke$ha being a transvestite who desires for men to allow her to fuck them in the ass in a bowling alley? That would be the only explanation for why she needs the guy to "turn around". And, maybe, if she had a penis grafted on then she assumes all penises result from grafting. Maybe she does need to be shown where a person's dick is located given that hers is in an unusual spot.

Well, now it makes sense!

Party In The USA: Acapella

And a Jay-Z song...was on.

Shatner: Fuck You

You would think this would get less funny over time...

Total Eclipse of the Heart: Lin Yu Chun And William Shatner

This happened.

Girls Like Boys With Skills

R. Kelly

Chappelle's Show
R. Kelly's "Piss on You" Music Videos
www.comedycentral.com
Black Comedy

Children's Choir: Still Alive