Ozzie Guillen's Castro Comment: Perspective

Ozzie Guillen, a baseball guy, made some favorable comments about Fidel Castro:

“I love Fidel Castro.” Time reported Guillen as saying in the article. “I respect Fidel Castro, you know why? A lot of people have wanted to kill Fidel Castro for the last 60 years, but that motherf****r is still here.”

He has been suspended for five games, after his expression of adoration for the Cuban leader pissed off Florida's Cuban community.

This evening on Hardball, Francis Suarez, chairman of the Miami city commission, spoke out about Guillen's comments saying, "It's about the most insulting and incendiary thing someone can say to this community." Suarez said further, "It's basically the worst thing that can be said in this community."

Now, regardless of your feelings for Fidel Castro, I think we can all agree that Suarez was going too far in his condemnation. Saying, "I love Castro" isn't the most appealing thing to Cubans, but is it really the "most insulting" thing he could have said to the Cuban community? Is that really the "worst thing" he could have uttered?

I contend that it is not.

To put Guillen's comments in perspective, let's consider the following comments he could have made about Cubans:


What happens when a Cuban gets a flat tire? He drowns.


What is the Cuban national anthem? Row row row your boat.


Cuban knock knock joke:
*knock knock*
Homeowner: Whose there?
Cuban: qué?
Homeowner: Yes, can I help you?
Cuban: ... qué?
Homeowner: I'm sorry. You knocked on my door. Do you want something?
Cuban: qué?
Homeowner: Um, are you looking for work?
Cuban: qué?


A Cuban walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Get the Fuck outta here u penniless filthy Cuban!"


Why were Adam and Eve like Cubans? Because their only food was fruit, they had no money, and they thought they lived in paradise


A Cuban was stumbling about in a bus station. He had tears running down his face, snot dripping from his nose, and crying like he was in terrible pain. A concerned female employee walked up to him and asked, "Sir, what is wrong? Are you homesick for Mexico?" The Cuban replied, "No, I'm from Cuba." She then said, "Are you homesick for Cuba?" The Cuban replied by letting out a miserable, blubbering cry through his increasing tears. The woman moved closer to comfort him saying, "Sir? What is wrong?" The Cuban finally replied, "I've lost my luggage. The cork fell out of my wine bottle!" And then he raped her, because Cubans are drunken rapists.


How to tell if you're Cuban: You have been in the U.S. for 10 years and still don't speak English.


Why are Cubans worse than Niggers? We brought Niggers here to do the work we didn't want to do, and they actually did it. Cubans floated over here like rats and they won't even lift their lazy fucking asses to contribute!


How many Cubans does it take to put down a toilet seat? No one knows; it's never been done.


Why was Ricky Ricardo the best Cuban? He at least looked white on television.


Now THAT is some insulting shit! "I love Fidel Castro" seems damned respectful in hindsight, doesn't it, Francis?

Which is a really girly name, by the way.

Trayvon Martin Political Cartoon

Subtle.

An Open Letter to Rand Paul

Before we get to this letter, please watch the following video.



Rand. Buddy, how are you doing? I bet the last few days for you have been a blast. You just won the notation to be the Republican candidate in the Kentucky! High Five!

But Rand, sometime you just need to shut the fuck up. Like, big time.

INTERVIEWER: Would you have voted for the Civil Rights Act of 1964?

PAUL: I like the Civil Rights Act in the sense that it ended discrimination in all public domains, and I’m all in favor of that.

INTERVIEWER: But?

PAUL: You had to ask me the “but.” I don’t like the idea of telling private business owners—I abhor racism. I think it’s a bad business decision to exclude anybody from your restaurant—but, at the same time, I do believe in private ownership. But I absolutely think there should be no discrimination in anything that gets any public funding, and that’s most of what I think the Civil Rights Act was about in my mind.

See. That is the sort of bullshit that you need to stop. This is not something to laugh off. If you are going to take positions on major policy issues, people are going to ask you to justify those positions. Welcome to politics. You are not an eye doctor any more*.

Saying you are not racist and that you are a fan of MLK in one breath, than in the next breath say that a private business can openly discriminate is complete bullshit. First off, anytime anyone begins by saying they are not a racist, you know they are about the say something super racist. Second, yes, Martin Luther King was a great speaker and true believer in his cause. But fuck Rand. FUCK. Setting aside the 175+ years of social, structural and legal racism, people were brutalized in Selma and Birmingham and rural Mississippi just because they wanted to be treated as humans. In 1963, six hundred students marched through the streets of Birmingham to protest the cities segregation. They were attached by dogs and fire hoses. Rand, I think we can agree that is fucked up.

But sitting in a chair nearly 50 years later you cannot say that Bull Connor had a First Amendment right to do that. That is the dirtiest false-equivocation I have heard in a long time. That "boorish" behavior that you would stand up against now rings hollow in the light of your comments. The Civil Rights Act of 1964 was one of many attempts to break the very long very destructive cycle of structural discrimination. The structural discrimination that allowed for a culture in which it was okay to attack people for wanted to eat a fucking grilled cheese.

So Rand. Shut up. We here at EoiaS like it when you rant against the Federal Reserver and promote the gold standard. We eat that shit up. But this bullshit is a bullshit bridge to far.




* Please see vonnegut on why that is a problem.

NBC: Fried Chicken for Black History Month

NBC Serves Fried Chicken & Collard Greens In Celebration Of Black History Month

They stole our joke.

What "equality" means.

Leila Medley, an undeclared superdelegate, described herself as being "in turmoil" over who to vote for. Said Leila Medley:

Here I am -- 71-years-old and this is the last time I'll be involved in this process to this extent -- and there's a woman on the ballot. And she's a viable candidate

Ignoring the question of "viability" with regard to Clinton a more important point need be addressed:

Voting for a candidate because of their gender, because of their race, is a step away from equality.

If we wish to embrace the idea that the categories of man, woman, white, black are all irrelevant to the question of whether or not an individual is capable of performing a given task then we need to embrace this idea, this concept, this truth fully and base our assessments of individuals on the person alone.

If you vote for Obama because of his race or gender; if you vote for Clinton because of her race or gender, then you have declared the race, that gender matter; that race and gender are important, meaningful criteria by which a person's abilities may be assessed.

Don't vote for Obama because he is a black man.
Don't vote for Clinton because she is a white woman.

Vote for the person who shares your ideals, your hopes, your vision for a better tomorrow.

Anything less is merely an act of sexism or racism which behooves no one.

Jena 6: Not a Disney Series.

The more I read about this Jena 6 thing the more confused I become. What happened, for those who do not know, is that a white student was assaulted by a group of black students. The black students (The Jena 6) were arrested for assault because they assaulted someone. This pissed off the black community because black students were punished for breaking the law.

Apparently racial tensions have been mounting* recently and the build-up to this situation is supposed to explain what happened. You know the story. Black student sits under the white student's tree. White students hang nooses from the tree. Black students stage a protest which is broken up. Black student's aren't allowed to attend the white student's party. Someone sets the school on fire and the blacks and whites blame one another. It's your basic racist idiocy run amuck.

The problem, though, is really the racism in the community. These events did little more than enflame that racism. So the black community is upset by the nooses, but as hanging nooses from a tree is not against the law the white students receive only minor school punishment. Then when black students actually break the law the black community gets hella pissed off, because the white students (who did not break the law) were not arrested.

I think that this indicates the need in this country for a High Council of Race Relations. If a group thinks that they have a legitimate point to protest they must present their case to the High Council. The High Council will then review the case and if it is a sensible point to protest then the protest will be allowed. If the protest is idiotic (such as protesting the punishment of those who broke the law) then the Council will now allow the protest and the would-be protestors have to go back to work. To be fair the High Council of Race Relations will have one white and one black member. I nominate Morgan Freeman and Sir Ian McKellen. They could easily sort this out and ensure that future protests only occur when legitimate grievances have been found.

*Best euphamism for interraction foreplay, ever.

All crimes are hate crimes.

So, that 20 year old woman who was tortured in West Virgina? The one who was stabbed, forced to eat feces, and called a Nigger? The woman who, "an assailant cut the woman’s ankle with a knife and used the N-word in telling her she was victimized because she is black, according to the criminal complaints."

Yeah, apparently her captors will not have hate crime charges brought against them.

Why?

She was not a random target.

So they did hate her, and they were racist, but they didn't hate her and act like racists in the right way.

Or, arguably, they were racist and hateful in the right way, because legally they weren't racist or hateful.

Go team.

Be a better Ignorant Racist.

A note from mikey: There are five parts. The first one can be found here

Mikey sent me a link to a youtube video about Prussian Blue, a "white nationalist folk teen duo" composed of two hot teenage Nazis. The five ten minute segments show the girls and their family interracting, performing, going about their daily lives, and making some of the characteristic mistakes ignorant racists make. So, in an effort to help out these two hot Nazis, I present...

Be A Better Ignorant Racist in 9 Easy Steps!

1. If you aren't Aryan don't talk about Aryan dominance. I can't stress this enough. If you endorse the agenda of Aryan dominance and don't have blonde hair and blue eyes you ought to at least be willing to dye your hair and wear colored contact lenses. The problem is that if anyone finds out that you dyed your hair and wear colored contact lenses you're going to suffer some media fallout. So, if you aren't Aryan, it's best to just leave "Aryan Dominance" out of your rhetoric.

2. Get the broken down trucks and tractors out of your yard. A well-manicured lawn can provide a wonderful backdrop to your polished rhetoric. Nobody is going to take you seriously if you talk about "cleansing the races" if you can't even cleanse your lawn.

3. Stay on message! During interviews, radio shows, television spots, or any public appearance you need to ensure that you and everyone else on your side stay on message! A cohesive presentation of family and group is vital to enhancing your rhetoric. If an elderly member of your family says, "I'm sick of all this Nazi shit." during an interview you've lost the "family first" audience. Nobody wants to adopt an ideology that tears a family apart!

4. Fabricate your Facts carefully! If you want to give examples of lesser races destroying society you need to craft realistic facts that seem true. Of course you must play to the fears of your audience, but you can also broaden your message by keeping your fudged facts realistic. If you use a broad brush to paint an entire race of people you risk that there may be some in that group who are known to your audience who go against your stereotype. If you fabricate lesser, more specific faults on specific members of a race then you can allow your listener, on their own, to create their own stereotypes from your specific examples.

5. Keep a civil tongue! Anyone can spew hate and vulgarity at the same time. A polished ignorant racist with a civil tongue will appeal to a broader audience.

6. Dress Professionally. Selling your ideology is also an attept at selling yourself. Don't wear your hog sloppin' clothing to a rally or an interview. Invest in a few professional outfits so that you can present a clean, professional, business face for your ignorant racisim.

7. Sex sells! Don't be afraid to bring a little sex into your presentation. Give your audience someone pretty to look at while you fill their mind with ignorant racism. Nobody wants to stare at a disheveled old man advocating an ideology of hate!

8. For God's Sake don't kill people or animals in public! You don't have to actually lynch someone to show that you would lynch someone. Keep the more violent "oogie" aspects of your ideology reserved for your hard-core audience. If you lynch someone in a town square in broad daylight people will think you're crazy, not a refined ignorant racist.

9. Play down the anti-semitism. Blaming the Jews is so 1930s. Besides, if you are advocating the ideology of the ignorant racist people will assume that you hate Jews. You don't have to say it. In the year 2007 there are far more groups upon which you can focus your hate. Pick a new group upon which you can focus and the jews and the blacks will be assumed into your ideology by the audience.

Hopefully these tips will help those delightful hot Nazis of Prussian Blue. I promise that if you follow these 9 easy steps and you'll be collecting followers faster than a Jew collects taxes!