4.2 Earthquake in Indiana Fills Slow News Day

At 8 a.m. eastern time a 4.2 earthquake occurred 15 miles east-southeast of Kokomo, 15 miles west-southwest from Marion and 50 miles north of Indianapolis, prompting numerous news agencies to fill previously unfilled minutes with needless witness reports.

Anne Magenthorpe of Kokomo reported that the earthquake "felt like the ground was shaking." When pressed for details Magenthorpe expounded: "Well, it shook. Like, prior to the earthquake there was no shaking. Then the earthquake happened and, whoa, the earth shook."

Paul Raginkrotch of Carmel reportedly "felt a shaking" as if "something had been shaken." Asked if the event was similar to any other Raginkrotch stated, "Well, you know how trains kind of shake the ground? This was like that, only more shaking."

Geologist Terry Nevarlade provided a scientific spin on the earthquake: "During an earthquake the ground shakes. Like, you know how when things move they send out vibrations? An earthquake is like that...but the earth is what moves...and shakes."

USGS specialist Hershal Bangenmom released a memo to news agencies indicating that the official USGS webpage for recent Indiana earthquakes has been updated, as there is now a more recent Indiana earthquake than the previous Indiana earthquake. When asked why the page was updated, Bangenmom replied, "Because there was an earthquake...in Indiana...this morning."

If the day's news continues to be uneventful numerous agencies plan on airing a brief documentary this evening entitled: 'Earthquakes, they shake the ground.'