Green Hornet: Seth Rogen > Ben Affleck?

So, here's my thing.

If Green Hornet is better than Daredevil, does that mean that Seth Rogen is better than Ben Affleck?

Haley Barbour: Moratorium Worse Than Spill

David Gregory: Governor, what's worse, the moratorium or the effects of this spill on the region?

Haley Barbour: Well, the moratorium... the spill's a terrible thing, but the moratorium is a terrible thing that's not only bad for the region, it's bad for America. 30% of the oil produced in the United States comes from the Gulf of Mexico, and 80% of that is from deepwater drilling. So that's a fourth of all our oil. This is gonna drive the price of energy up!"


I really wonder if there is any point at which these fuckwits would change which side of the scale they favor:


One Gulf of Mexico Oil Spill and they're still favoring the $ over the PLANET ON WHICH THEY RELY FOR LIFE. Is this one of those things where if they, themselves, are waist deep in oil they're still going to argue in favor of drilling? Or is there a point at which their heads come out of their asses? Have we reached a point where industrialization and capitalism have literally won, and if the entirety of the world was paved, all species dead except for ourselves and shit we eat, then Haley Barbour is fine and dandy so long as the dollar has a value superior to that of the euro?

I'm genuinely curious at this point. Because some of these assholes seem to be entirely ok with a paved world. If we destroyed every single plant, ever, but created machines to convert CO2 to oxygen would they be fine with that world? Is that what they want?

I thought that we as a species were sort of begrudgingly giving up nature to accomodate our other desires, that the goal was to strike a balance. But...this shit isn't a balance. When Haley Barbour maintains that economic concerns are more important than environmental concerns? That shit is scary.

The moritorium makes energy more expensive. The oil spill kills millions of life forms. And what Haley Barbour cares about is the cost of energy.

That's like a gunner on the Death Star thinking the problem with the destruction of Alderaan is that it requirs a recharge of the fucking laser.

Scott Pilgrim Trailer Songs

Scott Pilgrim Trailer Songs Mix Tape

It shall be the greatest movie, ever.
With the greatest soundtrack, ever.

Calories: You cannot "has"!

I have a package of eggs here according to which one egg has 70 calories. I also have a container of grapefruit juice indicating that 8 fluid ounces has 90 calories. But did you know that both the package of eggs and the container of juice are propagating a lie? Did you know that, in fact, eggs and grapefruit juice do not have calories? Did you know that no thing, at all, ever, has calories?

I just learned this yesterday, and it fucking pissed me off. Because, apparently, nothing instantiates the predicate "calorie", because "calorie" is not a predicate to be instantiated in the way that, say, "brown" is instantiated in particular piles of shit.

A calorie (with regard to food, a kilogram calorie) is a unit of energy the base unit of which is the amount of energy required to raise the temperature of one kilogram of water by one degree Celsius, which is about 4.18 joules (kilojoules when pertaining to food). What is a joule? Well, a joule is the energy exerted by the force of one newton acting to move an object through a distance of one metre. What is a newton? A newton is equal to the amount of net force required to accelerate a mass of one kilogram at a rate of one meter per second per second.

Do you understand any of that? Neither do I; because there was never a Magic School Bus episode about it.

Here's the thing, though: It is not the case that an egg has 70 calories. Rather, 70 calories is the amount of energy "given off", in a very loose and imprecise sense, by the egg when the egg is made subject to cellular respiration, which is this:

C6H12O6 (aq) + 6 O2 (g) → 6 CO2 (g) + 6 H2O (l)
ΔG = -2880 kJ per mole of C6H12O6

Whatever the fuck that is.

If one were to cut open an egg one would not find calories; calories would not be discerned by way of any of the five senses. Hell, one probably could not even derive calories from the eternal essence of eggness. Eggs do not have calories. Or, as it is written on the wikipedia page for Food Energy:

Nutritionists usually talk about the number of calories in a gram of a nutrient, but this implies that the food actually 'contains' energy. It's better to say that each gram of food (fuel) is associated with a particular amount of energy (released when the food is respired).

j'accuse!!!

If you read the 38 definitions for "has" none of them are applicable to the "relation" between calories and eggs, calories and grapefruit juice, calories and anything. Calories are not had, calories are not contained within, calories are not instantiated. Rather, calories are a way of talking about eggs with regard to a particular metabolic process of human beings. Independent of that process? Calories are entirely inapplicable to eggs.

So, here is another example of how anthropocentric jackassery skews the articulation of ontological entities within the world to be subject to human beings. We do not discuss eggs in themselves, eggs as they would be unperceived, unthought, unencountered by human beings, but rather discuss eggs in terms of human beings. Despite the fact that "has 70 calories" is a completely false, completely untrue, completely nonsensical predicate to apply to an egg, we fucking do it anyway. Because, well, we only care about, we only think about, eggs with respect to their utility towards a particular metabolic process of human beings. Eggs do not have calories, but with respect to a particular metabolic process we can consider eggs in terms of calories. So let's just put "70 calories" on the Nutritional Information sticker, because fuck the definitions of "contain" and "has"; we're anthropocentric jackasses who just want to know what eggs are to us.

It's the fucking BP Oil Spill all over again. We can't run a car on pelicans, we can't build a computer out of sea turtles, so fuck 'em! We are anthropocentric jackasses who only care about ourselves and our immediate needs. So fuck language, fuck the definitions of "contains" and "has", fuck nounemal eggs, let's just say that an egg has 70 calories because we're so fucking great that we can just do that. Is it true? No. Does it subvert one's understanding of eggs and their qualities? Yes. Is it completely butt-fucking stupid and a needless skewing of reality towards the needs of human beings irrespective of the actual, true qualities of the thing in itself? Sure.

But, man, can you imagine how big Nutritional Information stickers would be if they accurately articulated information such that it was true? Fuck making big stickers; let's just lie; let's just say that an egg has 70 calories.

Despite the definition of "has".
Despite the definition of "calorie".
Despite the ontological qualitites of eggs.
Despite truth.
Despite anything.

It's just easier this way.

Soccer is stupid [chat]

USA vs England: Once again raising the question, "How is a tie exciting?"


Dan: (on-air) We'll bring you the thrill of victory, the agony of defeat, and because we've got soccer highlights, the sheer pointlessness of a zero-zero tie.

The GOP doesn't even make it a secret that their in Big Oils pockets!!!

Ok....I know that you guys don't hear from me much on here. I've been following along with the summations about BP. I cannot fathom the following statement. Poor BP.

"I'm ashamed of what happened in the White House yesterday," said Rep. Joe Barton (R-Tex.) during a hearing on Thursday morning with BP's CEO Tony Hayward." I think it is a tragedy in the first proportion that a private corporation can be subjected to what I would characterize as a shakedown -- in this case a $20 billion shakedown -- with the attorney general of the United States, who is legitimately conducting a criminal investigation and has every right to do so to protect the American people, participating in what amounts to a $20 billion slush fund that's unprecedented in our nation's history, which has no legal standing, which I think sets a terrible precedent for our nation's future."

Way to go Republican party ---> Full story available at Huffington Post

Scott Pilgrim - International Trailer

"YOU PUNCHED ME IN THE BOOB!"