Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Santorum gets 3-Way from Frothing Mad Conservatives

A spunky Santorum covered the spread in Colorado, Missouri, and Minnesota by reaching around frontrunner Mitt Romney to secure three primary victories. Moving from a number two position to climb on top as number one, Santorum came from behind to collapse the integrity of Romney's erect position as frontrunner for the Republican nomination. A throbbing load of votes actualized a social-conservative wet dream, causing Romney's momentum to go down licket-split. While Romney is far from creamed by this loss, it may prod some to ask whether this spike in Santorum's appeal will cause buttloads of pundits to consider whether this lack of excitement will ream Romney in the end.

When asked for comment, the Romney camp stated, "Santorum may have shot his load today. These results are nuts, but we'll ride this out till the climax."

A Santorum spokesman replied, "We're trying to fit this win into our tight plan, and not come across as too cocky."