Saturday, June 21, 2008

Puppy [chat]

43 comments:

Mike Lewis said...

Elliot the Dog and his new friend Kirby

_J_ said...

Finally found a context in which Elliot is a large dog.

Caleb said...

Good god, I hate puppies...and people -- mostly people -- god damn people.

_J_ said...

I like the little Kirby puppy but realize that liking comes solely from his being adorable.

Moreover I realize that I oughtn't obtain a Kirby puppy given the requirements puppies place upon people and my unwillingness and inability to adhere to those requirements. Both in terms of time and finances I am not in a position to support a puppy.

Finally, I can't think of a good reason to get a puppy which is not based upon a desire for some mystical human/puppy relation. When I remove that mystical relation all I'm left with is the notion of a cute little fuzzy thing draining me of funds and restricting my time.

And if my funds are to be drained and my time is to be restricted I'd rather that come from a female of my own species rather than some furry little bitch.

_J_ said...

For Olbermann fanboys:
Why did Olbermann need to end his commentary by telling the President of the United States to 'shut the hell up'?
'Because I can't say, "Shut the fuck up," that's why, frankly,' Olbermann responded. The line stayed in."

_J_ said...

I'll allow Tim Russert's son to talk about him on MSNBC today and maybe, maybe tomorrow. But if in two weeks Luke Russert is being brought in on panels to discuss anything simply because of who his dad is? I'm going to be pissed the fuck off.

I can barely tolerate Ron "Shithead" Reagan being on MSNBC for no discernable reason other than his last name. The last thing we need is another asshole son wonking about on the air waves just because his dad didn't know how to use a condom.

_J_ said...

Al Gore to Endorse Obama.

One wonders if Gore will turn over the key to the lockbox.

_J_ said...

This picture is awesome.

kylebrown said...

That picture looks doctored. A tornado doesn't just exist like that. Where is the debris? Why are the buildings and trees it is next to unwavering under it. It just doesn't look right to me.

_J_ said...

The flag appears to be waggling quite a bit.

I don't think it looks fake. The issue I would raise is the part of that building that seems to be partially within the tornado. Why has it not been ripped apart?

But given how buildings function there would be a point at which it was not ripped apart right before it was ripped apart. So it's possible that this picture was taken at that time.

It's still a cool picture.

kylebrown said...

But tornadoes kick up dirt and debris by the ton as they swirl around. Here there is no debris. That is the thing that just looks so out of place, the lack of debris.

_J_ said...

True...

Maybe there is a kind of tornado whose composition and pressure system are such that they don't kick up a mass amount of debris? Perhaps it is all contained within the funnel cloud?

I don't know enough about tornadoes to know whether or not such a thing exists...but I can certainly talk about such a thing.

The other part of it is that the dirt and debris come from the surrounding area. So maybe there is not much dirt or debris behind it and it's just reached an area with trees and buildings and whatnot.

That doesn't seem very likely, though.

_J_ said...

McCain can has Alex? NO CANZ HAS!

A new anti-McCain television ad. It's actually quite brilliant.

kylebrown said...

That is a fantastic ad.

Also after doing some research, it looks like this picture could be real. It could be a picture of a phenomena which I have never witnessed.

_J_ said...

That does seem to describe what the picture portrays.

Roscoe said...

You know what a burger without a bun is? Salisbury steak. You know what Salisbury steak is? A trick played on poor people.

_J_ said...

Salisbury steak is a lie.

_J_ said...

I was just told that I look like Dan Aykroyd in Ghost Busters.

First, I did not know that Dan Aykroyd had a particular look in Ghostbusters. Second, I don't look like Dan Aykroyd. Third, who pulls "Dan Aykroyd in Ghostbusters" out of their ass?

kylebrown said...

Better than Coneheads, I guess. I'm assuming it is the same people who eat Salisbury Steak?

Roscoe said...

Kyle, I know, KNOW, you did NOT just say Ghostbusters is for Poor People.


I KNOW you didn't say THAT, because THAT would be WRONG.

kylebrown said...

Assume implications much?

I said people who pull 'Dan Akroyd from Ghostbusters' out of their ass are the same people who eat Salisbury Steak. Only implication intended meant there was people who voluntarily choose to eat Salisbury Steak.

kylebrown said...

I dream of day when Giuliani has faded away to be remembered as the marginal political figure he is. It will be a glorious day when I don't have to hear his name mentioned outside of some speck of trivia about the mayor of NYC when the planes hit.

kylebrown said...

Shit, that was supposed to go into the Habeas Corpus thread. Copying it there now...

_J_ said...

"I said people who pull 'Dan Akroyd from Ghostbusters' out of their ass are the same people who eat Salisbury Steak."

I have no idea what that means. But I think there may be a tautology hidden in there...

Roscoe said...

Summon the Lewis! Have him reveal it's camoflauge!

_J_ said...

He can't reveal camoflauge. He can detect the use of camoflauge.

_J_ said...

I heart Gabe.

_J_ said...

I deleted the Wii rant because it was stupid in comparison to the awesome currency discussion and the awesome habeas corpus post. I didn't want to have to keep scrolling past it to get to the good stuff.

_J_ said...

Last night I ran Zul'Aman and it has to be the most fun I've had in WoW for quite some time. The two items I need from ZA dropped (Hood of Hexing and Wub's Cursed Hexblade) but other people got them. Hopefully they will eventually be mine.

I really don't like going into a ZA group for the first time because far too often the group is composed of people who don't know what the shit they're doing. Since they've cleared Kara a few times they think they are "teh shit". So the run into ZA carrying their little "We are teh bezt" banner whereupon they get their assess handed to them and the banner lies in tatters upon the floor.

But people in the group seemed to know what they were doing, we all got along, and when items dropped that people could use they often initially refused them and offered them to others.

My only complaints are the Ret Paladins suck ass, girls don't know how to play the game, and shamans need to find a way to drop Totem of Wrath when they are healing spec.

Also, I want, nay, need to always be grouped with a shadow priest.

_J_ said...

I think my position on Spore has changed. Before I thought it was a mornic game with no discernable point which would only appeal to "game as art" faggots who can't appreciate the simple joy of collecting loot. But now? Now I think it is brilliant.

Of course, I still think Spore is fundamentally stupid. But as a vehicle for dick jokes? The possibilities are endless. As a self-defeating program? I loves.

If 50% of the spore creatures available end up being erect cocks with dick arms and penis legs? It will be a magnificent success due to its monumental failure. It will be fantastic.

Now I think I have to get the game if only so that I can populate the online community with Cockosaurus Tits, Penisodons, and Vagiblighters.

_J_ said...

Or I could make a creatured called an "apenis". It could be a penis that looks like a monkey, or a monkey that looks like a cock, or MAYBE a penis that looks like a cock...with a prehensile tail...and a predilection for throwing its feces.

Depending on how the online commmunity functions this could be the greatest thing ever. It would be like editing wikipedia pages to say "Bill Cosby died"...only you wouldn't have to worry about banning! You could just let your apenises roam free over the open plains of the Spore creature sharing community to delve into whichever nether region appeals to them at any given time.

_J_ said...

Bumblebee stings HURT.

While driving back to work with my windows down something clunked against the window frame. I assumed it was a bug or something but could not find it when I looked around. Then after I get back to work and head to my desk I moved my shoulder bag and something stung me.

Apparently when the bumblebee hit the window frame it bounced off into my t-shirt pocket. So when I moved my bag that apparently moved something or jostled something such that the bumblebee stung me through my t-shirt.

So I knocked the little fucker out of my shirt pocket and smashed its head.

Apparently Bumblebees do not lose their stinger. Also, the sting really fucking hurts. Also, I now hate bumblebees.

kylebrown said...

Bumblebees are jerks. So are yellow jackets, hornets, and wasps.

_J_ said...

I like to take the refrain from the song Lollipop by the Chordettes and find new phrases which fit.

Lollipop lollipop
Oh lolli lolli lolli
Lollipop lollipop.....

Jigglypuff Jigglypuff
Oh Jiggly Jiggly Jiggly
Jigglypuff Jigglypuff.....

Circle Jerk Circle Jerk
Oh circle circle circle
Circle Jerk Circle Jerk.....

Penis Pump Penis Pump
Oh penis penis penis
Penis Pump Penis Pump.....

Jewel Staite Jewel Staite
Oh jewel jewel jewel
Jewel Staite Jewel Staite.....

Prostate Check Prostate Check
Oh prostate prostate prostate
Prostate Check Prostate Check.....

Bored at work Bored at work
Oh bored at bored at bored at
Bored at work Bored at work.....

_J_ said...

Donkey Punch Donkey Punch
Oh donkey donkey donkey
Donkey Punch Donkey Punch.....

Sony Suck Sony Sucks
Oh sony sony sony
Sony Suck Sony Sucks.....

Money shot Money shot
Oh money money money
Money shot Money shot.....

Sharpie pen Sharpie pen
Oh sharpie sharpie sharpie
Sharpie pen Sharpie pen.....

Stapler Stapler
Oh staple staple staple
Stapler Stapler.....

Backspace key Backspace key
Oh backspace backspace backspace
Backspace key Backspace key.....

Shit at work Shit at work
Oh shit at shit at shit at
Shit at work Shit at work.....

Let me die Let me die
Oh let me let me let me
Let me die Let me die.....

_J_ said...

WoW Patch 2.4.3

Of note:
- Characters can get mounts at level 30.
- No more Curse of Shadow. Curse of Elements now affects Arcane, Shadow, Frost, and Fire damage.
- Magister's Terrace nerfed

Caleb said...

genius.

_J_ said...

Something.

_J_ said...

You lost some privacy today.

Did you feel it?

_J_ said...

This is kind of interesting.

One of our resellers is in China and called to let us know that he has some customers in China who want to order from us. When the customer service guys were talking about it I said, "So we're going to buy a product from China, someone in China will buy it from us, and then we'll ship it to the guy in China?"

It turns out that people in China don't have access to the things made in China which are sold to the U.S. and other countries. So it's easier for Chinese citizens to order from a U.S. company and get a Chinese shovel than it is for them to just buy the shovel we buy from China.

_J_ said...

"Apparently, a number of girls made a pact to get pregnant in order to bring someone into the world who would love them unconditionally."

Win.

_J_ said...

Photos from Mars.

Or at least a skillful photoshop.

_J_ said...

16-year-old Neil Beagley died. Rather than seeking medical attention he tried to pray himself to health.

Turned out it didn't work too well.