Helen A.S. Popkin

I'm going to take a break from being irritated at everything and today write about someone who brightens my week and adds spring to my step, Helen A.S. Popkin.

Helen A.S. Popkin brings joy to reality as MSNBC.com's Netiquette contributor. While some writers may follow the conformist path covering embattled world leaders and congressional oversight, Helen A.S. Popkin focuses on relevant, useful issues which truly impact our lives in diverse and complicated ways. Helen A.S. Popkin has explored the degree to which rabbits are adorable and answered the question Who, exactly, is that 'Leave Britney Alone' guy?. Helen A.S. Popkins is not afraid to traverse the hostile terrain of social networking sights or provide evidence that people look at pornography online. When there was a mass exodus from Myspace to Facebook Helen A.S. Popkin was there to provide her unique insight, "OMG! YR still on MySpace? Loser!".

While the topics she covers are themselves wonderful morsels of joy, Helen A.S. Popkins further delights her readers by providing her own literary style; the delectable icing atop an already diabetically sweet cake of bliss. Within her newest article we the readers are treated to a cavalcade of rhetorical bliss. Through the span of a scant three paragraphs Helen A.S. Popkins writes, "Cute, adorable, smoochie-woochie-whose-a-good-baby-yes-you-are! puppies", "cognitive dissonant", and "True that.".

Not any writer could wield those phrases in three separate articles spanning ranges vast and unknown. But within the same article, nay, within three paragraphs of one another, Helen A.S. Popkin successfully crafts a narrative utilizing voices, styles, and terms which some would say are completely unrelated and in no way harmonious. Helen A.S. Popkin's unapologetic mastery of the English language is an inspiration and a treat.

But perhaps Helen A.S. Popkin's greatest virtue, her most priceless contribution to the cause, is her ability to assess, to focus with honed precision upon the quintessential aspects of her study and provide sharp, decisive critiques:

And also, Twitter is stupid.

It really is. I mean, c’mon. You don’t have to get your bowels in an uproar to know that. Twitter is like an RSS feed to every boring aspect of your friend’s lives. And your friends are boring. How could they not be? Hourly updates on your best bud’s activities get dull pretty fast even if your best bud is Jack Bauer:

“woke up feeling all angsty…left arm tingly”

“oh noes…shot curtis today :-(”

“thinkin i gotta torture this guy. oh well”

“can’t remember last time i peed”

Yawn.

So, thank you, Helen A.S. Popkin. May your meaningful, incisive, unique commentary on the truly important issues of the day forever withstand the test of time. May your plain-spoken nature remain forever as the watchword of your craft. Yours is a voice, a style, a mind that will forever benefit those who take a moment from their day to delight in the pleasures your articles contain.

And above all: May your avatar forever scowl upon your readers reminding them that the task is not complete, the job has yet to finish. Yours is an eternal struggle, a quest, a life's work. For always your views, your style, your mastery, your gift is required. An endless task awaits you; forever shall your effort, drive, and motivation compel you to share with us, your humble readers, your priceless insight into that world with which we have but a passing familiarity. For, truly, how would we know of the internet, of social networking sites, of online gaming, of youtube, of rabbits...if not for you?