Mp3s are not Crab Bisque.

Sellers of digital media need to watch the Soup Nazi episode of Seinfeld.

The Soup Nazi was able to cook "great soup" desired by all. To obtain this soup a customer had to comply with the Soup Nazi's strict customer behavior requirements. The Soup Nazi could dictate the terms by which his soup could be obtained by his customers since he was the sole supplier of his soup. If an individual failed to meet his requirements the Soup Nazi could, and did, proclaim, "No Soup for you!" and the customer was fully denied soup; the customer had no other means by which the Soup Nazi's soup could be obtained. At the end of the episode Elaine finds the recipies for the Soup Nazi's soup, thereby allowing people to obtain the soup without adhering to the Soup Nazi's will.

The problem with modern resellers of digital media is that they desire to be the Soup Nazi while failing to understand the important lesson the Soup Nazi episode taught us all: Don't be a dick.

To stay with the Soup Nazi metaphor, the recepies have been out of the armoire since the mid 90s. Napster and its subsequent offspring allow customers to bypass the Soup Nazis of digital media and obtain files without complying with any requirements; sellers of digital music cannot proclaim, "No Soup for you!" No one needs to buy music files from Apple or anyone else to listen to songs. For, you see, bittorrent exists, the Elaine to their Soup Nazi, if you will. Customers do not have to adhere to any strict regiment of behavior to obtain the desired product. But does this mean that no one will ever buy digital media? No.

This weekend I purchased three Rifftrax. Rifftrax are .mp3 files of commentary that one plays alongside movies. Why did I buy them? The files are reasonably priced ($4 for a movie length of commentary), high quality (great audio quality and superb humor), and in a reasonable format (.mp3). I was happy to exchange money for this product. People will pay for products they desire. And, yes, if the product is only available from a Soup Nazi then the customer will adhere to the requirements placed on them by the Soup Nazi. But if a customer can bypass the Soup Nazi? They will.

The goal is to not be a Soup Nazi. The goal is to not make one's customers want to bypass the system. If the Soup Nazi was not a Nazi, but rather a pleasant man selling delicious soup? Elaine would not have delighted in the discovery of his recipies. Elaine would have happily bought his soup just as I was happy to buy Rifftrax. But if an individual or group maintain their Soup Nazi ways while there exist simple alternative means by which their product can be obtained? We'll make our own soup, we'll download our own digital files, thank you very much.